My mother is a boss

Last week my cousin Jennifer came over to discuss seating for her wedding next weekend.  I sat down at the table with my family for dinner, something I never do unless we have company.  After the seating arrangements were settled, we began chatting about random things and eventually got to the topic of pregnancy.  Then, we all started asking my mother about her pregnancies, and that is when I found out how much of a boss my mom is.

It was nearing the end of term for my mother's pregnancy when her water broke.  She was pregnant with my sister and was not sure if it actually broke so she called her doctor.  He advised her to come to the hospital as a precaution.  She told him she had an important dinner to go to and could not go to the hospital.  The doctor then said, "Good.  I have a dinner too.  Come in first thing tomorrow morning."

Early the next morning, my mother went to the hospital.  The doctor said her water did in fact break.  She would be going into labor soon and he advised her to get admitted.  She replied, "I can't stay.  I have to go home and cook breakfast for my family and take my husband to work."  So she drives home and does just that.  She cooks breakfast for us and drove my father to work before returning to the hospital.  She drove herself and parked in the hospital parking lot.

My mother gave birth to my sister five hours later without the help of epidural or other drugs.  The next day, a nurse advised my mom to call someone to pick her up to take her home.  She said she had arranged for a pick-up but instead, took my new-born sister home in her own car.  Her excuse?  "I didn't want to leave my car in the parking lot."

Boss.

-Thundalips

The rock and the diamond

Monday afternoon walking to lunch:

Doug: Holy crap look at that spider.  It's all white.  Must be an albinyo spider.

That's not a typo...

Last night:

Dad: You don't have class today?  It's Tuesday.
Me: I have classes on Thursdays now... I told you three times already!
Mama: There's not point of telling him.  It's like talking to a rock...
Me (to my mom): Yea... It's just like talking to you too.  Every time I ask what's for dinner you never give me a straight answer.  I guess there's two rocks in this family.
Mama: I'm not a rock! I AM A DIAMOND!

I need to start a Twitter for the crazy stuff my family says.

-Thundalips

Smoke out

Fair warning.  If you do not care about smoking meats, just ignore this post.  That is all that I am going to be talking about here.

It's 7:52AM on a Sunday, and I am awake.  Why?  There can only be one reason...

BBQ!  Well... I am actually just smoking a pork shoulder to make pulled pork sandwiches.

If someone were to ask me what my passion is, I honestly would have no real answer.  Science?  Microbiology?  People watching? Maybe...  But I would feel more inclined to say, "Barbecue." 

Through the years, I have developed a specific taste for food.  I tend to gravitate towards crunchy, smokey, often burnt, foods.  Throw bacon in the mix and I am sold.  I guess I take after my father who eats the same way.  I often find myself fighting with him at the dinner table for the same pieces of meat.  Because he never actually barbecued (or cooked in general...), I had to learn everything on my own (although I would happily accept an apprenticeship with Mr. Huang). 

Smoking is not as easy as it sounds.  I always thought it was a set-it-and-forget-it type of deal.  Apparently not...  The biggest thing about smoking is temperature control.  With a gas smoker, one would think this would be easily done since the gas flow remains constant through the cooking process.  However, this is not so.

The temperature of the smoker not only depends on the gas flow setting (high, medium, low), but it also is affected by the damper openings, wind factor, and most importantly, the wood.  The wood that is used when smoking could drastically change the internal temperature of the smoker if they should flare up.  My smoker went from a cool 180°F to 310°F during a flare up.  After that passed, it went back down to 150°F.  Not exactly a walk in the park trying to keep a constant temperature of 200-250°.  That is a wide range but the temperature can be unpredictable. 

To monitor the temperature, I have three thermometers set up - one of them being a dual sensor thermometer.  The door thermometer seems to be highly inaccurate so I placed a second inside.  Neither of these are digital...  I wanted a more accurate reading of the temperature so I bought the Maverick ET-85.  This will measure the internal temperature of the meat as well as the external temperature (oven temperature).

It's now 8:36 AM and the meat has been smoking for about 10 minutes.  However, time is not the deciding factor on when the pulled pork is ready.  It is the internal temperature.  Once the pork is 170°F, it is ready to be taken out.  Then, I get to use these!

They are called bear paws.  The box says they can be used for pulling pork, transferring, lifting, and carving.  I only see one use for this.  Pulling pork.

6:XX PM - Lost track of time since people came over.  The pork shoulder is finally done. 

Results

I honestly think that it turned out okay.  On a scale of one through ten, I would give it a six.  It was definitely edible.  For a first attempt, I am quite satisfied.

Since it is getting late, I must end this post abruptly.

-Thundalip

Back to blogging

That guy is ugly.

I finally finished my applications for graduate school!  That means more time for blogging, COD, and just general merriment.  But technically I'm not done completely.  I still have to actually apply.  That doesn't make sense to you yet but let me explain.  I have already sent in my application for the program that I am most interested in, but I am still waiting to apply to two other programs.  Both websites don't have open applications for the semester I am applying for and both schools are currently on spring break.  What does that mean?  I have to wait until Monday to call both admission offices to get help.  And the kicker is: I've already asked my professors to send in their letters of recommendation so the schools might get it before my applications.  I already have all my information ready to be thrown onto a form but I still need access to the site. 

In the mean time, I have loaded up on hours of COD and lounging.  After a few more days of this, I'll probably start cleaning my room again.  Something that is long overdue.

Last night I was talking to Andy about my birthday plans this year.  I have none.  Ever since graduating college my birthday's just haven't been as good as the college years (to be honest nothing has been better than those college years).  This is by no means a cry for a surprise party or anything of that nature so keep that in mind.  I really have no energy to do the things that I used to do.  We discussed possibilities to celebrate the occasion but nothing really tickled my fancy.  Maybe I really am just getting too old.

Lately work has been great.  I'm seriously starting to hone my ass-kissing skills, and they're coming along quite nicely.  I find myself in my manager's office at least once a day just chatting.  She gives me advice on life and tells me things from her personal life.  It's a pretty nice situation.  She even made me "assistant manager" a few weeks ago.  This was an unofficial title and had no benefits except having power over my other coworkers.  I had the opportunity to create the assignments for everyone and take charge of the project for a week or so.  It was a great learning experience.  What did I learn?  I'm glad you asked.  I learned that I love the power of being a manager.  I can seriously see myself as a power-hungry tool in the future.  I'm sure you can see it too.

Ah, and last but not least, my romantic life.  Or lack thereof.  My dad mentioned a few times in the past week that I should start looking for a nice Chinese girl to settle down with.  This was very unsettling.  You know that you've been single too long when your parents start telling you these things.  The only thing that could have made it worse is if he tried to set me up with someone.  It would be nice to settle down soon though. 

Recently my dad has been exhibiting symptoms of Alzheimer's.  The other day he showed me an old $100 he had (the one with the small heads like the $1).  He complained that the casino had cheated him out of $100 and gave him fake money.  Apparently he forgot that that's how they used to look.  I spent the next few minutes explaining to him that these were the old printed hundred dollar bills and that they had changed the design to curb counterfeiting.  He honestly forgot, which was scary.  He just had no recollection of a hundred dollar note ever looking like that.  A lot of little things like that are starting to add up and it's very obvious now that there may not be a lot of time left before he becomes completely senile.  It would be nice to bring a girl home to make him happy (and myself too). 

Until next time,

-Alex Thunderlips

Ominous beginnings.

Lately I have been getting a feeling that some terrible things will happen soon.  Call it a hunch, gut feeling, or paranoia. Whatever it is, it's consuming my life.  I am not a believer of fortune-telling, astrology, or any of the pseudosciences, but I can't seem to shake this feeling.  Whatever is going to happen, I think it's going to happen soon.  Within the next three months or so. 

Last night, I had a quasi-nightmare.  It started out with all of my friends hanging out at my house in the living room.  My parents storm in through the front door.  My mom is yelling at my dad and he has no reaction or response to anything she's saying.  I can already see that something terrible was happening.  My dad tells me he's quitting his job and my mom is stressing out about money.  My dad then says a bunch of things implicating he is also giving up on life.

He pulls Andy aside and lectures him for a while.  I wasn't close enough to hear the conversation, but I could see whatever my dad was saying was making Andy angry.  In a few seconds, Andy started swinging at my dad and it took everyone in the room to hold them back.

I couldn't deal with the situation so I left and walked around the neighborhood.  I ended up in a back alley somewhere.  It turned out to be a dead end so I turned around.  In doing so, my Gameboy inside my backpack flew out, crashing on the floor.  As I bent down to pick it up, I saw a hidden compartment outside of the house I was standing in front of.  I open the compartment to find a slew of video games.  Inside, I can see N64, SNES, and NES games of all kinds.  I take a quick scan to make sure no one is looking before I start to take some of them.  When I look up into the house, I see a little girl playing Wii (notice that all of the gaming systems in this dream are manufactured by Nintendo).  I try to sift through the games as fast as possible without her noticing, but I'm caught before I'm able to find anything worth taking.

As I ran back home, I began to feel the tension from the situation earlier.  When I get inside, I can still see that many of my friends are still hanging around, but most people had left.  I went to my room and found one of my lady friends in my bed sleeping, fully clothed.  When I look down, my shirt is missing.  Oh well.  I get into bed with her and pull the blankets back over us.  She tried to comfort me (nothing sexual).  We end up spooning. 

Until next time,

How did my shirt disappear so fast?

-Alex Thunderlips

A series of unfortunate events that is my life.

^^One of six new tracks on the re-release of Fearless.  Probably my favorite of the six.

Let's start off November's blog with dream sequences.  Last week I had a couple of dreams that were memorable for different reasons.  In the first dream, me, Anjuli, Andy, and a few other friends were walking out of some store and through the parking lot.  As we were walking to our car, hundreds of field mice scurried their way out of the bushes from an island between the parked cars.  I grabbed one by the tail and put it in a plastic box, the kind that turtles are sold in.  Then, I took it home and put some water in the box.  Just enough to cover its feet.  The mouse started absorbing all of the water like the spongy dinosaurs that you soak in water.  It grew big enough to fill the box and that's all I remember.  My second dream was terrifying.  I was in my room arguing with my dad for some reason and it got really heated.  He muttered in Chinese something like, "My own kids don't even love or respect me."  He started to walk away towards my sister room and I tried to stop him.  As I approached the doorway of my sister's room, I saw him open the window.  I could tell this was not going to end well.  He opened the window and jumped out as I reached out to stop him.  That's all I remember and it was pretty depressing to wake up from that dream.

It made me feel guilty for mistreating him for all these years.  My father is a very difficult man to understand and deal with which is still no excuse.  For the past few days, I've been trying to talk to him more, but, like me, he's in a funk that he can't shake.  It's depressing just knowing how depressed he is.  My mom also tells me that he may be going through the initial stages of Alzheimer's which is even more depressing.  It's believable.  My mom said he probably has five to ten years left before it really starts to affect his daily life.  At this point, he's already forgetting people's names and has trouble remembering little things.  I guess I'll need to try and patch things up.  Time to learn to be more patient.

Unfortunately, my patience has run out for a certain someone.  This person will remain nameless but a few people know what's going on.  I guess it's interesting to actually know someone THAT narcissistic.  To be clear, narcissism does not mean loving yourself.  The correct definition of a narcissist is someone who loves the image they project of themselves.  You may not like who you are on the inside, but you take pride and enjoy the image you present of yourself to others.

People are oblivious.  To quote Frank Outlaw, "Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny."  Definitely one of my favorite quotes of all time and applicable to everyday life.  If everyone would be more aware of their actions and how it affects everyone else, the world would be a better place.  I am, in no way, saying that I am perfect.  But, I at least take responsibility for my actions.  For the most part.  I think...  But, what can we do.  The human race is built on selfishness.  Challenge?

Which brings me to my next point.  If I ever go back to school, I am definitely joining the debate team.  Doesn't matter what school.  I don't think I enjoy anything as much as winning an argument.

I guess that's all for now...

-Alex Thunderlips